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  • Writer's pictureSamey Jo



I’m going cheesy on this post today. Hope you like it. I wanted to write about Independence. Yeah, yeah… I know, of course this is a good topic – being 4th of July and all… (I always hated it when the preachers would preach about moms/wives on Mother’s Day and about dads/husbands on Father’s Day, lol. Just my own annoyance. But here I am doing it on this topic! 😊)

Here is my reason. I think there is much to be said on the subject of Independence when it comes to the life we are called to. First, there are the conversations to be had about being independent, co-dependent, and inter-dependent. Second, there is a discussion to be had about our own ‘power’ when it comes to life and choosing. Third, we can talk for days about freedom.

We will begin with the first thing. I am a fan of independence. I believe there is greatness found in being independent. But there is another side to this. If I am only independent I will never learn how to truly trust my Father or have community in its proper context. The key is learning how to be independent AND interdependent. Too many souls swing to being 100% independent or 100% co-dependent. Neither of these are sufficient in showing us how to do life well. Co-dependence results in chaos and struggle beyond belief. It is co-dependence that brings detriment and failure to relationships. Independence causes us to trust solely on ourselves leading us right down the path to pride, loneliness, potential narcissism and ultimately destruction and failure.

Friends! If we can learn inter–dependence we can experience so much FULLNESS in our lives!

Inside of inter–dependence we gain a full understanding of who WE are, what we bring to a relationship and learning trust; learning how to trust both God and others. We can have safe community, close community, and simultaneously keep our own free will to do what is in our own hearts to do. This leads us straight to … our own power.

When we learn the value of who we are and what we bring to a community we also learn we have the power to CHOOSE. What a beautiful grace we have been given! An opportunity to DECIDE how we will think, process our circumstances, and truly live is in our hands! You may say, “Well that’s where you’re wrong! I didn’t decide or choose __________ (fill in the blank).” Correct. Things come and happen that we did not choose or want or even ever think would happen to us. Trust me! I have experienced this several times over! What still, and always will, remains true is our ability to choose and decide how we react.

There is a movie about the holocaust titled, Jakob the Liar, wherein Jakob is constantly lying about a ‘game they are playing’ to keep encouraging his son through the horrific perils they are facing. It is a profound movie. What I love within this is the idea that no matter our current situation we get to choose our attitudes, our reaction TO the event we are facing.

If my best friend dies, I get to decide how I will live past that. I choose my attitude through it, my response, my own outcome. Do I get to bring her back? No. Do I still go through the grief of loss? For sure. But the ultimate outcome within my own heart I get to choose. And I have. I am embracing much these days. Laughter, Joy, Contentedness – all mine for the choosing.

Finally, understanding this brings me so much FREEDOM! (I know. I said we could talk about this for days and it’s my shortest part. Maybe we’ll get to more about it later. smile.)

I hope and pray you are leaning in to your own independence, inter-dependence and freedom! Life IS Good!

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